WITH AUDIO NARRATED BY BUD SMITH. BONUS! Hobbies include... —ignoring the huge life mistakes I’ve made by obsessing over the tiny editorial mistakes I’ve made. —cancelling plans based on the unreasonable...
Read or listen to the audio, narrated by the author herself... 1. The waiter with the enormous aborted fetus head and thin orange hair who picked fries off the...
Part 2 of the exciting new series Hobbies Include from Brian Alan Ellis HOBBIES INCLUDE —fantasizing about falling down stairs while wearing a t-shirt that says “The Dream...
Below, you'll find a list Brian Alan Ellis's Amazing Hobbies:
—realizing that having hobbies/passions has pretty much ruined my life, so…
—fantasizing about someone playing a sick...
Welcome to part one in Sean Kilpatrick's ongoing series where the incomparable author offers us the 'skinny' one of many bat-shit crazy (and beloved) artists. Enjoy!
Egon predicted the...
Below is part 4 of the original series 'Missed Connections' by Sean Kilpatrick. Check out the previous 3 here.
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LISTEN TO THE AUTHOR-NARRATED AUDIO ///
You...
I once fucked a ballerina. We were at a party. She told me it was her birthday and offered me another drink. I don’t remember her name, but she...
You were the petite, curvy girl with the studiously erratic crimson dye job, sporting a dress no artist could sketch on hurriedly enough, and I was standing next to...
Portland is the hot new city to move to. People are friendly, there are trees everywhere, and we’re so politically correct, it should really be our middle name. Forget...
TALKING BOOK's FIRST PROMOTIONAL VIDEO by artist Keegan Grandbois
https://vimeo.com/161654719 The Talking Book Gang has teamed up with renowned video artist Keegan Grandbois to produce something truly unique...I've been drawing a lot lately. Which means using various markers. Which of course, means appreciating the high of each type. But if you're like me, and you should...
Sometimes people email me about writing advice or ask how I got started or whatever and I honestly have no idea what to tell them other than 'fucking do...
Sperm ricochet guaranteed to pale its purse, vile keepsake authorizing likenesses till handkerchiefs everywhere stood tall in their verse, spawned under court order direct from Satan’s lap, knotting the...
The following is the second installment of many kickass excerpts from Brian Alan Ellis's new book A Series of Pained Facial Expressions Made While Shredding Air Guitar ACADEMIC...
Authors are usually weird people. Not like, when a clearly attractive/popular person calls themselves 'weird' or 'nerdy' or whatever, but like, actually weird. Surely you've relished the worlds these...
If you are subscribed to our newsletter then you just read The Talking Book Hearsay #1 and you're still reeling in the excitement of it all. If you haven't subscribed to...
FORWARD EXPLAINING A TRUTH YOU ALREADY KNOW BUT SPEND EVERY MINUTE OF LIFE AVOIDING LIKE THE TERRIFIED ANIMAL YOU ACTUALLY ARE Forward by Jereme Dean Dear Reader, There’s a strong possibility you’re...
I’ve been meeting a lot of people who wonder, “How is a short story written, what is involved?” I figured I’d break it down into simple steps. They don’t...
